In life, whatever we decide to pursue or challenge, we’re often told that we must give our one hundred (or even more) percent in order to succeed. And in most (if not all) cases, that’s true. When we put in the effort, we’re able to push forward and accomplish our goals, transform dreams into reality, and make the impossible, possible. While growing up, I’ve learned that this concept has been proven true, time and time again. But recently, after a small exchange with a friend, I began to think about the relationships in my life.
I’ve made and established many relationships, whether it’s with friends, significant others, and even family. And after a lot of heartbreak, a lot of nights spent thinking alone, accompanied with this aforementioned chat that I had with a friend, I started to notice similarities between the relationships that have worked and those that have sadly ended. Of course, there’s the whole spiel that life just happens. Because we get so caught up with our own daily lives, interests and priorities change, it’s only natural that we lose touch with certain people.
But now I think that’s not completely true. It’s that we stop trying. We stop giving our fifty percent of effort in order to maintain that relationship and because of that, it dies. So why is it fifty percent and not one hundred? It’s because in a relationship, where there’s two people involved, we’re meant to meet the other person halfway. If we always gave one hundred percent of ourselves, while someone else gave less than that, we’d become exhausted and may feel like that we’re the only one trying.
I can personally say that I am the latter. I would put in one hundred percent of myself into a relationship, while the other person only gave so much. At first, I didn’t expect anything. I thought that this was what a good friend/family member/person should be and that they would naturally reciprocate my effort in due time. But then reality hits and suddenly, I feel like I’m not wanted and that all the effort I put into the relationship was for nothing.
Even now, I firmly believe that in order to maintain a healthy relationship, both parties need to put in their own fifty percent and meet each other halfway. However, as much as I want to believe in solely that, I also think that there are certain exceptions to this rule. We mustn’t forget the genuine people that we encounter in our lives, those that deserve our one hundred percent no matter what. So pick and choose carefully, unless your soul becomes worn out and you begin to despise those whom you once considered close.